Vive le différence !

It has been said: "To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little."

"To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all."



Poor James, over at http://nourishingobscurity.blogspot.com/ . Long story short, he took it upon himself to add a voting poll to even out another voting poll he had done earlier. This post is for him. :D (forgive me ;D)


It has been said: "Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit."




WOMEN...

A department store opened in New York City that sold men and a woman decides to visit it in search of a husband.
At the store’s entrance, there’s a sign outlining the department store policy.
The first rule states that you can only enter the store once.
There are six floors and on each floor you can choose a husband or elect to move on to the next floor.
You cannot visit a floor more than once other than to leave the building.
The woman visits the first floor.
The sign reads:
· Men with jobs.
She moves on to the second floor:
· Men with jobs that adore children.
She moves on the the third floor where the sign reads:
· Wealthy men that adore children and are very handsome.
She thinks to herself, "that's a very good deal" yet moves on to the fourth floor:
WOMEN...

A department store opened in New York City that sold men and a woman decides to visit it in search of a husband.
At the store’s entrance, there’s a sign outlining the department store policy.
The first rule states that you can only enter the store once.
There are six floors and on each floor you can choose a husband or elect to move on to the next floor.
You cannot visit a floor more than once other than to leave the building.
The woman visits the first floor.
The sign reads:
· Men with jobs.
She moves on to the second floor:
· Men with jobs that adore children.
She moves on the the third floor where the sign reads:
· Wealthy men that adore children and are very handsome.
She thinks to herself, "that's a very good deal" yet moves on to the fourth floor:
· Wealthy men that adore children, are very handsome and help with the household chores.
She decides to move on as things are constantly improving:
· Wealthy men that adore childern, are very handsome, help with the household chores and are very romantic.
The woman is about to make her purchase but can't resist moving on to the sixth floor.
There the sign reads:
· You are visitor number 31,456,012 on this floor.
· There are no men here.
· This floor exists as proof that it is impossible to please women.


& MEN…

Opposite this department store, another department store opened that sold women. The sign on the first floor reads:
· Women that love sex.
On the second floor the sign reads:
· Women that love sex and are wealthy.
On the third20floor the sign reads:
· Women that love sex, are wealthy and have large breasts.
Not a single man has visited the fourth floor.



On a Trans-Atlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning.

One woman in particular loses it. Screaming,she stands up in the front of the plane. "I'm too young to die!" she wails. Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on earth to be memorable! No one has ever made me really feel like a woman! Well I've had it! Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN??"

For a moment there is silence. everyone has forgotten their own peril, and they all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. Then, a man stands up in the rear of the plane. "I can make you feel like a woman," he says. This tall, tanned and built guy with jet black eyes starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time.

No one moves. As this man approaches, the woman begins to get excited. He removes his shirt. Muscles ripple across his chest as he reaches her, and extends the arm holding his shirt to the trembling woman, and whispers: "Iron this."